i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
Randomize
