This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
I saw two morbidly obese women get winded after fighting over the last motorized wheelchair at Walmart
These are the moments in life you observe a force greater than us at work
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize