Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
It's 5am and I come home to you naked on the kitchen table and 3 people I never saw before fucking on the back porch ... and my weed gummy worms are gone. fuck you I'm taking your mom's offer
Ya know what's the worst? Being drunk and wanting to show someone a picture of your goddaughter but not wanting to open the pictures on your phone because the first one is of someone's dick..
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
its liver damage thursday
Randomize
