If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
Somewhere out there, someone is getting laid. And then theres me, watching Star Trek porn while my roommate plays World of Warcraft next door
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
I'm on my "fiiiiirrrst" glass of wine- the quotes mean it's the last of the bottle- so I really need you to pick up your phone so we can talk about this
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
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