How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
Every fourth of July I get sentimental when I think back to the one where we drove around baked off our asses crashing multiple cookouts listening to Team America's "America, Fuck Yea" on repeat. I miss us.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
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