tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
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