you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
Randomize
