been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
Randomize
