oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
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