I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
Randomize
