Dude I got a text from you at 1:30 last night and you didn't use any vowels
Haha, I didn't want to buy any... we're in a recession you know
I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
Me. At least after what I've been through.
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
Randomize
