Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
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