so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
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