dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how did operation slutty penguin go?
pretty epic. there was a guy who was also dressed as a penguin. i asked him if he would keep my eggs warm while i went fishing for the winter
50% drunk capacity currently
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
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