Why the fuck do they always fuck on couches in porn?
Don't ever text me while you're jacking off. EVER.
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize