they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
What changed your mind?
Being sober
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Woke up next to my vibrator and a recipe for fudge brownies. If that doesn't scream I NEED TO GET LAID, then I don't know what else could.
Randomize
