Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
Randomize
