Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
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Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
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Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
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