You were right. It hurts to walk today.
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
Randomize
