yeah well we're currently on the phone and she's telling me about how much she misses me and all this shit and i muted myself and i'm watching porn.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
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