Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
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