We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
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