So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
Oscar is the man. He keeps getting pictures of hot nude women with messages in spanish saying "i hope you like it" sent to his phone
whose oscar?
the baller who i guess decided to give out a fake number at the bar last weekend. luckily that fake number was mine. i have enough porn to last me until next month.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
