i would punch a child for taco bell
before smithy murders me i need you to know 3 things. 1) i got with smithy's little sister last night. 2) i will always love you like my own brother. 3) smithy's little sis digs anal.
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
I was lying there too hungover to move when my dog jumped onto my bed and set half a calzone on my pillow. Best. Dog. Ever.
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
Randomize
