Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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