Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
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