Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
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