i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
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