I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
You were wearing a cookie monster onesie and telling everyone you were actually the sausage monster..
On the bright side I still got laid
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Randomize
