I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Randomize