well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
I supernannyed him into submission
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
There are leaves in my underwear?
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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