I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
Randomize