North Korea, Best Korea!
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
I queefed so loud it echoed.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
Randomize
