I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
Randomize
