Drunk x Brooklyn = problems getting home. If I don't make it you can have my computer and my bitches. You're welcome.
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
Randomize