We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
Is it wrong that I have to schedule a family Sunday brunch around my mom's weekly banging of my stepdad. And why do I even know this??
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
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