oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
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