I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
Randomize
