butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
gotta love it when a reminder comes up on your phone and u think u forgot about a meeting or something then u read it and its only to remind me to go to the titty bar at 3
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
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