I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
Randomize
