You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
if only i could text you this smell
Swine flu is the new snow day.
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
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