That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
Randomize
