I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
Randomize
