...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
I hear youre working today. To keep you entertained, ive compiled a list of condiments that my dick has NOT been slathered in since last Friday: Relish, and raspberry jam. That's right.
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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