why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
She made me put my jeans under her mattress so that I wouldn't leave in the morning while she was still sleeping. Apparently I just look like "that guy".
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
Randomize
