allegedly i woke up at 5am sat in the dishwasher and peed
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
you will always have a special place in my vag
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
Woke up handcuffed to a half gallon of beam. Yep. This is my life.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
Instead of politely asking me to shave, he passive-aggressively left me a groupon for a bikini wax. So I passive-aggresively fucked his roommate. And his roommate didn't mind my bush when he went down on me. Anyway, do you want the groupon or not?
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
Randomize
