I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
Never let your siblings swipe right.
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
Randomize
