just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
Randomize
