I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
Randomize
