I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
The air was thick with penises
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
You can kiss the security deposit goodbye after you and your boyfriend did donuts on his moped in the middle of the apartment. It was impressive since you were both too drunk to walk.
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Randomize
