arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
Randomize
