She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
